Malea continued her drive to her parent’s home.  She arrived at the familiar house, open to possibilities. The next few days flew by, with holiday festivities that included family and friends, and an amazing amount of food. She remembered holiday celebrations throughout the years, including when her children were young.  She thought about holidays in the last few years, and how she wanted things to change.  As the days went on, she began to feel something.  She wasn’t sure what it was, but it felt like hope for holidays to come.

As the holiday events continued, Malea decided to take small trips on her own to places that had meaning for her. She went to places that she frequented in high school.  She returned to the beach where she spent time pondering the future. She took time to sit and just feel.  She watched the water, and the sun.  She remembered sitting on the sand at all times of the year, and feeling like the sun was reaching out to her as she watched it move across the sky.

She drove by places where the highlights of her life took place.  She drove by her high school and the theater where she performed on many occasions.  She took back roads, appreciating the trees and just the drive.

She took time for restaurants that she enjoyed and made time for friends. She helped family along the way and remembered some drama that helped motivate her to move away.

Malea thought about her relationships, past and present. She thought about her marriage, and how much hope she had when she got married.  She remembered the days that her children were born and how much hope she had for them.

Malea visited grave sites for family that had passed.  She remembered her grandmother and spending the holidays with her cousins.  She thought about the Christmas tree at her grandmother’s home, and how many presents were around the tree in the morning. She remembered all the cousins sleeping in the same room, and how many times the adults had to yell to tell them to be quiet and go to sleep.  She smiled to herself remembering all the women in her grandmother’s tiny kitchen getting everything ready for Christmas dinner.

Malea set aside time to revisit her college.  When she drove on campus, so many memories came flooding back.  She remembered walking to class in a foot of snow, playing frisbee, and parties in her apartment complex.  She remembered the day she met her best friend, and so many other people.  She remembered events that made her smile, and events that made her sad, but she was able to acknowledge that all those moments brought her to this one.

Malea couldn’t wrap up her visit without thinking about her wedding. She and her husband were married in a small church in the area and had the reception at her parent’s home. She thought about that day, and how happy she had been.  She thought about the family that came to celebrate with her and her new spouse, and how much hope there was. It made her sad to think about how it ended, but she didn’t regret getting married and trying to make it work.

Malea made stops at some other places that held memories and hope in the past, and found that they continued to hold hope, even if it seemed like a different kind of hope. She thought about how much she had changed over the years, and about other ways that she was still the same. She would never regret getting married, becoming a mother, staying close to her parents, and reconnecting with friends. She didn’t regret the work she did on her marriage and was coming to understand that her decision to leave her marriage was also the right decision.

As Christmas drew near, and her family came together, Malea smiled, thinking about the future. She didn’t know what the future held, but she knew that she could make it what she wanted it to be. She hugged her kids, made new memories, and was thankful for the possibilities.

Whatever the year brought you, whatever the new year holds, remember who you are, and who you wanted to be. We all go through ups and downs. Sometimes, we have to think about the past, evaluate the present, and adjust your future to what you need it to be.

Malea took a trip to the past, to find the person that she lost.  Revisiting people and places helped her find the spark that she can use in the new year to heal and find a new path. Divorce is never easy but it can be healing. It can be the start of something wonderful.  It can mean new opportunities.  It can mean change, and it can mean finding your joy.

Wherever your journey takes you, I hope you find what you need at this holiday season.  Best wishes to you are yours for a season filled with magic, hope, and connection. Even divorce can be a part of being happy, for life.